Thursday, January 23, 2014

Why Periods Are Annoying

If you're a guy, or a girl and you don't have your period yet/anymore, you can just laugh and thank God you don't have a period, or you can widen your eyes to the size of golf balls and start hoping you'll get your period as late as possible.
This post is kind of a continuation of my very first post, It's Easier to Be a Guy. That post has a mini version of what you're about to see here, because in the time between these two posts, I've discovered some more annoying period-related stuff.
  • Let's say you change your pad/tampon during 5th period. You go to your locker, la dee da dee da, and as your coming up to your locker, a rush of 70 sixth graders come fast-walking down the hall, right past you, and they have a full view of your locker (and take advantage of it too!). Now you have to stay at your locker for an extra 5 minutes for the sixth graders to pass by, because who wants to be seen pulling a pad/tampon out of her locker? I don't know how everyone else does it, but I basically stick my butt into my locker and slip it into my back pocket (or sweatshirt pocket if I'm wearing one). If you're wearing a skirt/dress, I guess you're shit out of luck for hiding it on the way to the bathroom.
  • If you ever forget to bring period supplies (pad/tampon) and you happen to need some, the school pad and tampon vending machines are empty! Even if you do happen to have a quarter on you, the school doesn't even USE the pad/tampon dispensers! Never mind resupply them, the school never supplied them in the first place! This has never happened to me before (thank God I'm so prepared all the time), but if you forget to bring pads/tampons on a day when you need them, you have to ask the teacher to go to the nurse. And they always ask why you need the nurse. And then you have to TELL them that you're on your period. And your teacher will forever know your cycle.
  • Buying period supplies in public is so embarrassing. Not just for you and the cashier, but also for anyone looking on. Maybe it isn't so embarrassing for other women, who have more experience toughing it out in embarrassing situations, but it sure is for me (see the post "10 Different Topics & Stories").
  • Periods don't flow in the water, but the second you step out of that relaxing, warm bath water, you have to RUN to that already-pad-stuck-on underwear, and put it on, even though you're completely wet and your underwear will stay wet and soggy for the rest of the day, because you put your pad-ed underwear on while you were wet. Who's got the time to dry yourself off before blood drips all over the place?
  • When your period isn't heavy enough for a tampon so you are forced to use a pad! Uterus: I DEMAND THAT YOU USE A PAD!

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