Sunday, September 20, 2015

How I Feel About the Term "Pansexuality"

(Similar: Pansexual Awareness Day)
I have found that the term "pansexuality" is widely misunderstood, so I wanted to make a post about it to clear some things up.

Dictionary definition:

A common person's (inaccurate) definition of pansexuality:

The difference between bisexual and pansexual:
Things I've heard and whether or not I agree with them:
  • "It's impossible to be pansexual. There's no way you can be gender-blind and just not care what someone's gender is." I agree with the second part of that statement. Most people think pansexuality is being blind to someone's gender. But that would be impossible, because men and women are very different. However, that's not pansexuality. Pansexuality is being attracted to ALL genders, not REGARDLESS of gender. So that stultifies the first sentence.
  • "Pansexuality is basically the same thing as bisexuality." They are similar, but pansexuality includes non-binary and trans people, whereas bisexuality is exclusively male and female. (see above)
  • "Pansexuality is for Tumblr people. Normal people don't actually use it." Yeah, I guess you could say that. But I'm your average person and I use it and identify as it.

Why I think the term "bisexuality" is offensive:
Because it excludes trans and non-binary people, when there's no way someone will be attracted to MEN AND WOMEN and exclude trans/non-binary people. I feel like if someone did that, it's probably because of internalized transphobia. Trans and non-binary people have the same parts as men and women! It's not like they have different genitals!

Why I identify as pansexual (for right now):
  • The term "bisexual" is inaccurate for me. I could be attracted to trans or non-binary people.
  • I find the term "bisexual" offensive to trans/non-binary people because of their exclusion, and I feel like it's almost transphobic, which is extremely not okay.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

10 Unfortunate Moments for Quiet/Socially Anxious People

I diagnosed myself with social anxiety last fall. It usually flares up at the beginning of the school year because I have to warm up to everyone again. On top of that, I'm also pretty quiet in certain situations. This can make for a tepid-looking personality to the casual observer.
  1. When I'm talking at a normal volume and no one can hear me. "You talk so quietly!" Or maybe you need to listen closer!
  2. Some people think I'm really quiet and shy (usually acquaintances or other students at school) and some people think I'm loud and opinionated (friends, especially close ones).
  3. When I'm sitting a few feet away from a group of people but don't want to just invite myself into the group. If I'm lucky, someone will invite me in, and they'll usually say something along the lines of, "Julia! Come sit with us!"
  4. Any kind of vagueness. Please explain everything in full detail so I don't have to ask a question.
  5. Getting a bad participation grade even though I know a lot of the answers in class. Usually it goes something like this:
    Teacher: what's the answer to number five?
    Me: *thinks I know the answer but not 100% sure*
    Another student: fifteen!
    Me: goddamnit
  6. When someone says "hello" or "how are you?" as I'm passing by. After this happened a few times, I developed a few answers that you can't go wrong with.
    For "hey!" or "hi/hey Julia!":
    1. Hey [insert person's name here] (if time permits)
    2. Hey!
    3. Oh, hey!
      For "how are you?"
    1. Good, thanks (if I'm passing quickly).
    2. I'm fine, thank you.
    3. I'm good, how are you?
    4. Good thanks. How are you?
  7. When I need to buy something and I'm not with friends/family. Just the thought of walking up to the cash register and reciting my order is scary. What if I forget part of it? What if someone cuts me in line and I can't say anything about it? What if it takes too long to get out my money/card and everyone's waiting for me while I fumble around with my wallet?
  8. When I am with friends and I'm buying something and they assume I'm too shy/anxious to purchase it myself. I'm fine when I have people I know around me. Because if something weird happens (which it never does, but I still worry about it), my friend(s) will be there to save me.
  9. When people unexpectedly strike up a conversation with me. I would like to be mentally prepared for when I have to face my social anxiety.
  10. When reconnecting with friends I haven't seen in a while, and I need to warm up to them again and they notice but aren't sure why. "You seem quiet today. Are you okay?"

Saturday, September 12, 2015

Article Response: Political Correctitude

Note: I wrote this post before fully reading the article because I didn't want the article to influence my opinions. However I did skim the first couple paragraphs. This post isn't a direct response to the article, it's more of a spinoff question regarding my opinion on political correctness (in general, not just in the presidential elections).

For reference, this is the Google definition of "political correctness."

We live in a very politically advanced age.
Is political correctitude good?
           The young people of this generation strive to be more accepting of diversity (LGBT+, races/ethnicities, religions) and want to do the right thing. It's an example of political development at its finest.
            I think political correctness is a good thing, otherwise it would be regression rather than progression and it wouldn't happen. I find that political correctitude benefits me because I'm not discriminated against for my sexuality or my ethnicity. Political correctitude also prevents bullying because now when you call someone a "fag" or a "nigger" it's offensive rather than your average insult, so now rather than people agreeing with you, they'll scold you for being insensitive. I feel like the world is a better place now that people care about hurting other people's feelings. I also think that the people who don't believe in political correctitude (Donald Trump, for instance) are stuck in the past and are the same people who still believe in old-fashioned gender roles. They refuse to change their views based on what's actually right and wrong and instead accept what they're told to believe and hold on to it (such as still believing in gender roles that make no sense) and are convinced the new generation is "going soft." It's likely that all the old-fashioned thinkers who oppose political correctitude are in an ethnic/racial/gender/sexuality group that's not commonly discriminated against. I.e., cis white males. If you're not experiencing it, it's hard to empathize with and care about discrimination.
            I try to be politically correct to a point. I express my unadulterated opinions, and they usually happen to align with the politically correct ones. If they don't, such as my view on the death penalty (pro), that's fine too and it just means I have a different opinion that other people might not agree with. I don't try to conform to politically correct opinions just for the sake of political correctitude.
Political correctitude opposers argue people go to far with it and people are too touchy and too easily offended, but to that I counter: doesn't that police how offensive you can be, which is a good thing because less offensive things will be said?

            Regarding the article, do I think Trump will win the election (for the party/for the presidential elections)? No, I think the politically correct young people of this generation outnumber the crusty old-fashioned thinkers. Plus, some of the old-fashioned thinkers disagree with a lot of Trump's extremist views.